Truth time…getting real with you guys today. Being a personal trainer, I put a lot of pressure on myself to ‘look the part’ and ‘feel the part’. That may not be right or healthy, but that’s just how I feel. I feel the need to have the six-pack and to have the big guns (even though I’ve never had a six-pack because I love food more than abs) so today’s confession is super tough for me, but I want to be authentic and real with you guys in hopes that someone out there relates and knows they’re not alone.
Here it goes…I’ve gained 10 pounds in the last 3 months. And no it’s not ‘muscle weight’ and no I’m not pregnant. My belly has gotten softer and I’ve lost my ab definition and my pants are a little tighter and my shirts are a little snugger. I have hypothyroidism. An auto-immune disease that really wreaks havoc on your hormones and metabolism. My thyroid went haywire the past few months (not sure why) and caused some fast weight gain that made me feel a little out of control. It’s no fun when your body stops responding to your training and you don’t feel like yourself.
So what am I doing about it….am I restricting calories? NO. Am I upping my workouts to include an extra hour of cardio or more weight training? NO. Am I saying ‘well, might as well throw in the towel and eat junk food forever’? NO.
Do I feel a little out of sorts and has my confidence been shaken? Sure. Am I a little bummed that my body stopped responding to my training the way I want it to? Absolutely. But I am NOT doing any extreme diets or crazy workout routines (maintaining my lifting 3 days a week, 1-2 runs per week, 1-2 yoga session per week, and maybe 1 sprint/hiit day if I feel good enough). I’m still just focusing on getting stronger and maintaining good healthy so I can present that example to my daughter and my clients.
This is new for me. A few years ago, if this would’ve happened, I would’ve basically stopped eating, run more miles, and been upset the whole time. But these days I’m continuing with my training, continuing to eat enough food and focus on nutrient-dense food to fuel my body well, focusing on listening to my body, and waiting while the new meds take time to work.
I’m going on vacation next week and bathing suits will be involved. I am going in with confidence, knowing while I’m chasing Madeleine on the beach, she won’t care what I look like, as long as we’re having fun together, and that’s what really matters. Not whether or not I have a six pack or a slightly larger tummy than normal.
Will I lose this weight in two weeks? No. It’ll take a few months to get back to where I feel comfortable and ‘normal’, but I’m giving myself grace and time to go through it knowing I may never get back to my ‘normal’–and heads up, our ‘normal’ changes throughout our different seasons of life. I share this to hopefully lift up some of you struggling with similar things. Know you’re not alone and this journey is tough when your body feels like it’s out of your control. Give yourself grace. Be confident no matter your size. And continue to do things that make you feel good. Remember, it’s the journey that gives us confidence in ourselves, not the destination so keep on keeping on.
Love you friends!